Beware of Green Chairs

     I have been using this illustration a lot lately so I decided to repost this story.

     Beth Moore tells a story in one of her lessons that illustrates the need to replace the bad with the good. There was a woman who had a hideous green chair. It was worn and ugly. She hated it! Every time she walked by it, she just got more and more frustrated. One day, she had enough. She dragged the chair out to the trash for the trash man to pick up. For days she would walk by the spot where the green chair once was and notice the big empty space. She didn’t have the money at that point to buy a new chair. The space seemed so vast. It didn’t seem right. After a few days, she went out to the trash heap and dragged the chair back into the house to its place of honor. She hated the empty space more than she hated the chair.
     There are many things we hate in our life; our sin, our habits, our activities, etc. We want them done away with. Sometimes, we make a commitment to rid them out of our life. However, if we do not put good things in their place, we will soon drag them back into to their original position. Let’s say you decide to give up an activity you do every Friday night. You have determined it is not glorifying to God and causes you to sin. Your spirit hates it. You need to find a positive activity to do every Friday night in its place. If you don’t and you sit at home bored every Friday night, you will one day hate your boredom so much you will go back to doing the activity you didn't want anymore.
     Do you have a green chair in your life? Something you hate? Are you ready to drag it to the trash? What are you going to put in its place? If you end up hating the empty space more than the chair, the ugly green chair will be back in your life before you know it!

So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life.

James 1:21

What is Your Story!

     A while back, Dwayne taught on the importance of knowing your story! His sermon was basically his testimony. Some of you have never heard my testimony. If you are going to read my devotions I started thinking it would be good for you to know my journey as a Christian.
      I am one of those people that have struggled with the lack of punch to my conversion. As a preschooler, my uncle started picking me up for church in a big blue church bus. He would always pick me up first and I loved the experience and time with my uncle. The people of my church did not ignore me, each of them started caring for me and soon I had an extended family. When I was in the fourth grade, I attended a revival at my church. When I left for church my mother told me not to get my dress dirty because I was to wear it to school the next day. I remember sitting at church and listening to the evangelist which was something I usually did not do during the sermon. When the invitational prayer was given at the end of the service, I knew I wanted to accept the Lord Jesus as my Savior. I wanted to enter into a love relationship with him! I went down front and prayed with the pastor. I remember the force that urged me to go up front and surrender my life, it is an unmovable force that I have never forgotten. When my uncle brought me home, he came in with me to talk to my parents. As soon as my mother saw me she could tell I had been crying, she made an assumption that I was crying because I got my dress dirty. She started lecturing me and and sent me to the my room. My uncle interrupted her and explained what had happened. She felt horrible and apologized. It is one of the few times I remember my mother apologizing to me! I continued to grow in my church but it was basically scripture knowledge. I started dating Dwayne when I was 15 years old. Dwayne was not a Christian at the time and soon my church attendance started being affected. One Sunday, I was at the lake fishing with Dwayne and his father and a huge storm rolled in. I was very scared: actually all of us were concerned but they will never admit it. I made a bargain (Yes! I now know we should not make bargains with God but give me grace, I was still young). My bargain was that I would get back in church if He saved me from the destruction of the storm. I was back in church the next Sunday. When I was a sophomore in college, Dwayne became a follower of Jesus. We were married about a year later and attended a church in our college town until we graduated. When we graduated we moved and started attending First Baptist in Broken Arrow, Oklahoma. It was here, I started to spiritually grow in my relationship with Jesus. I feel my personal, heart felt journey with Christ began at that time. We grew to the point of becoming teachers, Dwayne was ordained as a deacon, and then we felt called to the ministry. We moved to attend seminary in Fort Worth, Texas. After seminary, we were church planters in Montana for seven years. We then moved to Fort Gibson, Oklahoma and Dwayne pastored a traditional 100 year old church for four and one half years. After those years, God called us to focus on reaching young adults and we started Fusion church to reach the age group where only 20% or less attend church. Every step we have taken and every assignment God has given us, has taught us more about the character of God. I have learned about His grace, His forgiveness, His empowerment, His love, His workings, His faithfulness, His longing for His children, His father's heart, His provision, and His never ending care. It is with this foundation that I share His lessons with you. My spiritual gift is exhortation and He has provided me much training in teaching. He molded my heart towards women's ministry. Teaching on a blog site is a new avenue for me and He is revealing His faithfulness to me in a new way. I have never considered myself a great writer; though I am trying to teach myself again by studying a grammar book. It is amazing what I have forgotten. Many years ago, I realized that one of the talents God gave me was the ability to see Him in any situation. It is how my mind works and how I ponder on the works of God. Writing these devotions teaches me discipline and allows me to use my gifts and talents and since I have to write it, it keeps me humble. That is a perfect picture for me. Thank you for letting me share this part of my calling with you. I love each of you in a special and unique way! Even those of you who I do not know by name or face, your spirit is in my heart due to the mystery of God!
    What is your story? Have you written it out? Have you shared it with others? God has spent much love and care writing it, all you have to do is embrace it!

When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your soul!
Hebrews 12:3 (The Message)

What Kind of Friend Are You Being?

     We have all heard the saying ‘you made this bed now sleep in it’! Often in life we have no idea what bed we are making until we end up with a bed we don't want to sleep in. I say this because in the last few years I have made a bed I don’t want! Being a pastor’s wife is sometimes demanding and at times; overwhelming. Add being a mother, an employee, a daughter, a political candidate’s wife, a home business owner, a friend, and now a grandmother; and at times, I seem to find myself totally spent. When I find myself spent, I tend to withdraw and the ones I tend to neglect are my friendships. I feel I have nothing to give them and my relationships usually involve me being the strong one, me being the listener, and me being the advisor. So, when I feel I can’t do it; I selfishly hibernate to my home and snuggle with my husband and my dogs. They can love me and I don't have to be strong and I don't have to have all the answers. Here is the problem. When I am not open, honest, and vulnerable with my friends to let them know when I am not strong, when I am hurting, when I need a friend, and when I don’t have the answers, then I feed the ‘Tonya’s always strong and don’t need me’ mentality. The result is that I find many good friends have retreated from including me in activities since my actions have said that I do not have time for them. In reality, sometimes I don’t have time for activities but I always make time to help the hurting person. However, I don’t get to go around publicizing who I have been counseling and nobody knows that I have spent ten hours that week helping a hurting person. Then when life slows down and I start breathing, my need for friendships resurfaces; but since I have neglected my friendships, I end up finding myself very lonely.

     I think God puts a strong need in women to have women friendships. Life’s struggles and hurts often drive those friendships away or drive the desire for them away. However, we need women to learn from, to share with, to be crazy with, to help us be good wives and mothers, to pray together, to cry with us, and to call us out when we need it. We need to cherish our friendships more. We need to protect them more. We need to nurture them more. We need to give grace more. We need to communicate our feelings more. We need to be more Christ like. We need to be strong sometimes and weak sometimes. We need to be venerable, open, and honest. We need to lay down our life for our friends!
      What kind of friend are you being? What friendship do you need to nurture?

Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family.

Proverbs 18:24

Bucket Full of Fear

     I am sick and tired of seeing those I care for not succeed in their lives because of one thing. . FEAR! I am not talking about fear of snakes or spiders. Though there are some similarities. I remember when I was around seven years old and a neighbor moved our dog house, for some reason I don’t remember. There were a ton of grass snakes under the dog house. Knowing my mother had an extreme fear of snakes, he put all those snakes in a bucket. That evening when she got home, he called her out to the front yard and showed her his bucket full of little surprises. She started screaming and took off running. He chased her all the way down the street and back. She yelled very bad words at him the entire time, but she never quit running. I think every neighbor on the entire street was standing in their yards trying to figure out what horrendous crime was being committed against their neighbor! Logically, if she just faced the bucket like it was no big deal, nothing would have happened. Even if he had thrown the snakes on her, they couldn’t have done anything to her, they would have just slivered away! Fear is what makes the situation bad and fear is usually not logical. There are many things in the bucket of our mind: fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of abandonment, fear of inadequacy, fear of loneliness, fear of not being loved, fear of emotional hurt, fear of non-acceptance, fear of humiliation, fear of abuse, fear of…….etc. Satan picks up our buckets to taunt us and we take off running. As soon as we run, he runs after us. We can panic and scream all kinds of things, but until we stop running and face the bucket, the chase doesn’t end. In reality, the real issue isn’t the fear of the bucket. Satan will always be willing to chase us with a bucket full of false fears; he is the father of lies.     
     The real issue is your trust of God. Do you trust Him to protect you and help you with whatever is in your bucket? If you really trust Him, you won’t run at the sight of your bucket. You will stand firm, trusting Him to protect you against Satan’s taunting words. By standing firm, there is no chase, no drama, and no panic!
     What is in your bucket? What things does the bucket keep you from doing? If you could do those things, would they be a blessing to you? If so, then we can say that your fears are ruling your actions and keeping you from experiencing the blessings you could be enjoying! Who loses in this situation; Satan or you? Isn’t it time you win and show Satan that you are not afraid of anything in your bucket because you trust God totally to help you overcome its contents? Stand firm and embrace your bucket!

Fear not (there is nothing to fear), for I am with you; do not look around you in terror and be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen and harden you to difficulties, yes, I will help you; yes I will hold you up and retain you in My (victorious) right hand of rightness and justice!......For I the Lord your God hold your right hand; I am the Lord, Who says to you, Fear not; I will help you!

Isaiah 41:10, 13

God Is Sufficient

     Last week was a hard week for me emotionally. One thing that added to the emotional stress was my daughter. She is serving the Lord on the mission field in Peru. She experienced a break up of a special relationship and it broke her heart. My heart was broken for my daughter and the fact that she is on the other side of the world only made it harder. I yearned to be with her and just love on her but I could not be. I thought I knew dependence on the Lord but when I had to put my daughter and her broken heart totally and completely in the hands of God, it taught me a deeper level of dependence. I did not own the glue to put her heart back to together nor did my arms stretch long enough to hold her as she cried. I had to rest in the care and love that God has for her. I kept telling myself that as much as I love her, God loves her more! He was with her. He could hold her. He could heal her heart. He could restore her soul.

     The days were a roller coaster of emotions. Sometimes she was getting stronger and sometimes she was hitting bottom. However, watching her stand on her faith in our God and resting in His love made me very proud of her. Not only did she amaze me, she taught me about that God is completely sufficient. He didn’t need me to work in her life; He was totally capable of it all by Himself.
     The turning point for her was when she spent a morning in prayer and in His Word. She let God take her from one verse to another and He ministered to her soul. She wrote down sixteen scriptures to concentrate on and that let her mind focus on the truth of God instead of the lies and confusion of Satan.
     Whatever you are going through, God has a Word for you. Have you let Him show you what it is? Are you standing on it? Are you letting it be your focus?

Remember what you said to me, your servant – I hang on to these words for dear life! These words hold me up in bad times; yes, your promises rejuvenate me.

Psalm 119:49

Can You Trust In the Darkness?

     If you do not have a totally spontaneous personality, you most likely get frustrated in your Christian walk when you can not see clearly the direction God is leading you. Often when things seem to be at their best, we get a curve ball thrown our way and the direction we thought we were to go changes. Sometimes, we can understand the change and see how it is best. Other times, we don’t understand. We often say things like, “but God”, “I am needed in what I am doing, why do I have to do something else”, “You told me to do this and now you want me to do that?”, “What will the new direction be like?”, “I need you to lay this all out for me . . .I need to understand”, “I don’t want to do go this directions”, etc. Trust is following when you can’t see. I use to pick up a blind friend for church. I would walk her to the car and into church. She had to totally trust me to lead here and if remember my klutziness you would understand that it was trust in more than me! Lol If she refused to go where she could not see, she would never go anywhere!
    Yesterday a friend shared these words with me, “Sometimes only the step I'm on, or the very next one ahead, is all that is illuminated for me. God gives just the amount of light I need for the exact moment I need it. At those times I walk in surrender to faith, unable to see the future and not fully comprehending the past. And because it is God who has given me what light I have, I know I must reject the fear and doubt that threaten to overtake me. I must determine to be content where I am, and allow God to get me where I need to go. I walk forward, one step at a time, fully trusting that the light God sheds is absolutely sufficient.”
     Do you trust Christ to lead you? Do you trust Him to be the light unto your feet? He will give you what He needs you to have. Sometimes his light will shine like the day and you will see everything clearly. Other times, His light is like a flashlight, showing you the path to take in the darkness. Occasionally, it is one of those tiny little flashlights that only show you the next step. No matter how much light Jesus uses to illumine your path, it is still Him leading. He does not change in the darkness. Does your trust?

By your words I can see where I’m going; they throw a beam of light on my dark path.

Psalm 119:105

Can You Sacrifice for the One Who Sacriiced for You?

     Are you ready for Easter? It is less than a week away. Easter is celebrated in a variety of ways! Keeping the focus on Jesus during Easter takes the same effort as it does to keep Him the focus of Christmas. When you have children, it takes even more focus. Holiday’s in general can easily be taken for granted because we get caught up in the events. Busyness can overshadow the true meaning of holidays. Many times when we are away from home and living in another culture, we miss our traditions and the real meaning of the holiday begins to become more of an internal focus. As I pondered these things, I started thinking of some of my special friends and daughter who will be celebrating Easter in other parts of the world. How will they celebrate and what are they learning from being away?
      For many years, we have had men and women serving our country in Iraq. Dwayne and I have a friend from Springfield, Missouri who is working on Army airplanes in Iraq for the next few years. We got to know him when he came several times to Montana on mission trips.  Every year his church in Springfield would help our new church by coming and conducting sports camp for the local kids.  Our friend, Nathan, was the servant to the group.  He was the one that drove the van, ran around getting food, made lunches, delivered lunches, and ran to the store many times each day for whatever was needed at the moment. He did this with a great heart and without complaint.  Last year, right before he left to go overseas, he realized that he needed to get real with God, and after many years of thinking he was a believer in Jesus Christ; he surrendered his life to Him and became His follower. This will be his first Easter as a Christian. He won’t be seeing family on Easter, or attending Easter services at his church, or seeing all the children dressed up in their Easter clothes carrying their Easter baskets, and he won’t be having a great home cooked Easter dinner. Instead, he will be attending a sunrise service on the soccer field of his army military base. Then, he will have a special lunch cooked by the cheifs at the army dining facility (DFAC). However, he won’t be having a pity party; he will have intimate time with God; away from all the busyness of our life here in the states. When I asked him how he was growing spiritually, he told me, “It has been interesting to experience this strange land. It has been fun to learn that I am in the land of Babylon and not too far from Ur where Abraham came from. Babylon is not far from Baghdad. There are times that I think that God has brought me to the land of Babylon to deal with me as he did with Israel. God had taken me away from everything that was familiar to me. All distractions removed; just Him and me. When I was home on my last R&R, I actually looked forward to coming back to Iraq, just to get back to the simple life again. It is strange how you get institutionalized when you are here. Your days are spent in such a small area compared to what you have back in the states. We have six choices of places to eat : DFAC, Burger King, Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, Subway, and Popeye’s. But most of our meals are at DFAC. It is free: you just wash your hands, get your card scanned, and go through the line. It was weird to me the first time that I got into my truck at home and could drive anywhere I wanted to. Freedom was something that I had taken for granted. Just like taking God for granted in our busy lives. Coming over here really put things into perspective for me.”
It has always been my belief that Satan’s greatest tactic to make Christians ineffective is getting them busy. Busyness is destroying our lives, our families, our relationships, our health, and our intimacy with Jesus. I am thankful that no matter how busy I become, no matter how I neglect my relationship with Jesus, He is never too busy for me!
     Has your life gotten too busy? Are you going to spend time with Jesus this week remembering the sacrifice He paid for us: the sacrifice that gives us the ability to have a relationship with our Lord and Savior? After Jesus endured the suffering from sacrificing Himself so we could have a personal relationship with Him; I wonder how He feels when we are too busy to nurture that relationship? May we sacrifice our busyness this week as we honor the sacrifice He gave for us!

After telling everyone good-bye, he (Jesus) went up into the hills by himself to pray.

Mark 6:46

Happy St. Patrick's Day

     Happy St. Patrick’s Day! I know that most Christians see St. Patrick’s Day as another worldly holiday that we should ignore and just get through. Like most holidays, the world and Satan has done their part in changing its meaning. Today, it is a time of drinking parties and wearing green so you don’t get pinched! So, to help counteract the world, I am once again reminding you of the origin of St Patrick ’s Day.

     What we know of his life is taken from his two works: the Confession, a public letter he addressed to Coroticus, a British chief who raided Ireland, killing and enslaving Christian converts. Patrick tells us he was born at Bannavem Taberniae, but just where that was we do not know. It is calculated to be in England, Scotland, or Whales. He was, as far as anyone has been able to determine, a Britannic Celt, raised a Roman Catholic. The year of his birth and the date of his death are equally confusing. It is a scholarly debate! We also do not know if March 17 was the birth or the death date of St. Patrick; it may in fact be neither.
     At the age of sixteen Patrick was captured by Gaels and taken by boat to Ireland where he was sold as a slave. His six years of captivity were spent tending flocks. During this time he experienced a spiritual awakening and began to have dreams and visions which he considered to be divinely inspired. One of these dreams contained a message to escape, telling him that a ship would be lying ready for him. He made his escape and traveled two hundred miles to find his expected ship. Three days later he landed in either Britain or Brittany. Wandering through the barren countryside, Patrick and the crew avoided starvation when a herd of wild pigs appeared in answer to Patrick's prayers.
     He returned to his home, but once more the course of his life was directed by a dream. He saw a man approaching him, bearing a letter from the people of Ireland which urged him to free them from slavery; "We beseech thee, holy youth, to come and walk once more amongst us."
     Patrick studied and became a priest and then a bishop. He went to Ireland and to spread Christianity among the pagans of that land. Missionaries had been to Ireland before him, but the country was still primarily ruled by the Druids. Though St. Patrick never claimed the performance of a miracle in his own writing, tales of his miraculous exploits against the troublesome Druids abound.
     One of the stories concerning St. Patrick which is often judged authentic, is the tale of the shamrock and the Trinity. The doctrine of Three Gods in One, each separate and distinct, yet each totally God, is claimed by Christians to be a mystery and is accepted on faith. In trying to teach his converts about the Trinity, St. Patrick held up a shamrock explaining that the three leaves represented the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, while the stem was the Godhead itself from which they proceeded. This is said to be the origin of the use of the Shamrock which is customarily worn on St. Patrick's Day.
     St. Patrick lived a life of strenuous missionary activity before until he died in either 461 or 492. Many thousands of Irishmen were converted through his labors. He founded churches and schools, at least one college, and generally organized the Church of Ireland.
     There are several things we could do to celebrate the life of this man known as St. Patrick. We could boldly share the love of Christ with someone today as St. Patrick did to the people who had taken him into slavery. Another thing we could do is to wear a shamrock; not only to honor the trinity but to help produce the opportunity to share the real meaning of St. Patrick and how he used the shamrock to teach people about the God, the Savior, and the Spirit we serve!

It's All God

      Many months ago I wrote a devotion called ‘What A Difference A Day Can Make’! I have lived that statement for over a week. I am a person who usually does not back away from encouraging people with words. Sometimes, they are welcomed and sometimes they are not. However, the emotional struggles around me during the last week has been so overwhelming, I have been lost for words! My words have been useless to ease the pain of others. Within a the same few days I found myself dealing with a broken hearted couple in our church whose child was resuscitated from a SIDS episode and died three days later, a young lady who is a part of our Bible study and who was the baby sitter of the baby when he stopped breathing, a family member who received information that there is nothing that can be done for their critical illness, and a broken hearted daughter from a breakup with the young man she was planning on marrying and to top it off she is half way around the world. I wanted to climb into bed, pull the covers over my head, and not wakeup until this terrible nightmare was over. Except I couldn’t: I had to keep enduring each day! I retreated to a place I rarely go: a place of silence. My words had no power in these circumstances. There was no magical encouragement I could give to make these peoples hurt go away. I was powerless and I hated it!
      The reality, that I do not like to face, is that I am always powerless! It is never me. It is God’s wisdom, God’s words, God’s grace, and God’s comfort. Sometimes I get the blessing of being His instrument of delivery but the impact of the delivery is totally and completely God. It is the Word of God and Our Great Comforter the Holy Spirit that ministers to the broken hearted. When I didn’t have the words: it was God’s Word and the Holy Spirit that comforted my daughter, the mourning couple, and the hurting babysitter. God really does not need me!
     One of the lessons I have learned this week is when you don’t know what to say, lovingly share God’s Word. His word is healing! It is where the comfort and the power to endure lies. Make your words speak His Word!

By your words I can see where I’m going; they throw a beam of light my dark path.

Psalm 119:105

What Are You Doing With Your Junk?

     Saturday, Dwayne and I enjoyed the beautiful weather by going for a long walk. It felt good to do our exercise outdoors and it made me eager for Spring. It was nice and warm, the green was beginning to pop up everywhere, and I was enjoying my time with my husband. As we are walking, I started noticing the trash along the highway and in the ditches. Some trash was there by normal everyday life; like blown tires, broken head lights, and broken glass. Collisions tend to leave behind garbage! However, most of the trash was from people who throw their trash out for others to deal with. There was pop cans, cigarette packages, fast food sacks, and the worst of all; a toilet! Why do people feel the need to throw their trash all over others environment?
     People also do the same thing both emotionally and spiritually. There are times that trials and life collide and people unintentionally leave their trash along your path. It is easy to have grace and compassion for people who endure wrecks in their life. However, there are people that have no regard for others and they dump their trash everywhere they go. If you are not careful they can get you right in the middle of their junk.
     What are you doing with your junk? Jesus has a dump and He wants you to bring your trash to Him. Though others get hurt along with us sometimes, we should not go around purposefully dumping on people. Let Him take you junk and spread His love and blessing spread out on others.

Mean people spread mean gossip; their words smart and burn.  Troublemakers start fights; gossips break up friendships.

 Proverbs 16 26-27

Live for Today

     When I married Dwayne, we would sit and talk about our future together. We talked about where we would travel, how many kids we would have, and what it would be like to be old and sit in rocking chairs on the front porch. He promised to love me for the rest of his life and to grow old with me. He has done a great job loving me and the fulfillment of those promises aren't far away! It was great talking about our future life together and future love with each other. His promise to love me to those rocking chair days, alone; was not enough . Promising to love me in the future was wonderful but I needed more! I needed his love every day to the future! I have to say that I have been blessed that he has fulfilled my needs since he first told he loved me in January of 1977. However, if all he would have done was promise me love when we were old, it would have never worked.
     You may think that illustration is ridiculous because nobody would promise to love and take care of you when you are old and not love you before. However, how many times do we do that to God? As I was singing one of my favorite songs in church one Sunday, I started noticing the words. It was all about loving and worshiping God in Heaven and it got me thinking. How many times do we say that in Heaven we will fall on our face in the presence our Lord but we have never fallen on our face here when we feel his presence? How many times do we say that we will sing praises to Him forever in Heaven but we do not joyfully sing praises to Him on Sundays or throughout the week for that matter? How many times do we say that we will serve Him for all of our days in eternity but we do not serve Him today? Our actions should show that we love Jesus, now! Heaven is not the beginning of our worship to Jesus, it is the fulfillment of our worship to Jesus. We do not have to wait until Heaven to feel His presence, He lives with us so we should be able to feel his presence now !
Are you loving God now? Or are you focusing on loving Him in Heaven? Do you praise Jesus now? Or are you going to wait until you praise Him in Heaven? When we talk about our worship of the Lord, we should definitely 'live for today!'

So come, let us worship: bow before him, on your knees before God, who made us!
Psalm 95:6

What Are You Writing?

     I often listen to the book channel when I am driving. I do not get to listen to a whole book, only chapters here and there. The other day I heard a part of the book that I will never forget. The story was about a woman who was talking to her councilor. She had endured a very hard, hurtful life. She had become an addict and now she was trying to heal. The counselor told her to imagine that her life was a book with 600 pages. The first 400 pages have been written. It has already been lived and the story cannot change. However, the last 200 pages are yet to be written. She was asked what she wanted them to say. She can let them be a continuation of the first 400 pages or she could change the story. The decision was hers.

     It made me consider the many Christians who have had very dark and hard chapters written in their life book. Some get stuck and write the same chapter over and over: chapters of bitterness, doubt, anger, unforgiveness, etc. Others accept the strength, grace, power, and forgiveness from God and move on to a new story.
     What are you writing?

Live full lives, full in the fullness of God. God can do anything, you know – far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.

Ephesians 3:19-20

I know some of you could not listen to the song from Wednesday, so here are the words.

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for families
Protection while we sleep
We pray for healing
Prosperity
We pray for your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while you hear each spoken need
Your love is way too much to give us lesser things.
What if your blessings come through raindrops?
What if your healing come through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know you’re near?
What if trials of this life is you mercy in disguise?
We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel you near
We doubt your goodness
We doubt your love
As if every promise from your word is not enough
All the while you hear each desperate plea
When friends betray us!
When darkness seems to win
We know, that pain reminds this heart that this is not our home
What if the my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst?
This world can’t satisfy
What if the trial of this life, the rain, the storms, the hardest nights are your mercy’s in disguise?

How Bad Do You Want It!

     It never ceases to amaze me that we want spiritual maturity but we fight with everything within us to not have to walk through the trials it takes to mature us! It is the valleys of life that makes us grow. We do not tend to grow on the mountain tops.

     I am overwhelmed with deep concern for many people I love. I have many friends and family that are going through major hurts in their lives. I would love to step in and save them from their situations but I do not have the power. I am sure our Abba Father would love to step in and keep up from trials. However, as our All Knowing God he can see tomorrow; He knows what those trials will produce. He loves us enough to let us walk through it.
     We need to change our view of trials. Easily said than done! We need to accept our struggles as opportunities to grow up . . . Up to God!
     As I had all these feelings stirring in me today, I heard a new song on the radio. It speaks about this issue. It ask many questions but three that speak to my soul are: What if the blessing comes through raindrops? What if the healing comes from tears? What if the trials of this life are mercy’s in disguise.

Your homework today is to go to this website and listen to the song ‘Blessings’ It is not released yet so this is the only place you can find it until April 12th.

http://www.laurastorymusic.com/

Don't Do It Alone

As I have stated before, I have worked at eating healthy and becoming fit for almost four years now! Wow . . . four years! My goal weight has not been achieved thanks to the aging process but I am moving in the right direction. My first 18 months was easy, I was a wellness manager in my career and I had to live it every second. Then I went to a job that it wellness was played with but there was no commitment. Funny thing is that described a growing attitude within me and I started gaining weight. I was eating right but eating too much and had too many special occasions. I also had become bored with exercising myself all the time. However, I hated exercising with other people, usually way younger people, because I compared my achievements with what they could do and I wasn’t happy with myself. Then when I had a medical problem and couldn’t exercise for two months, the habit was broken. I exercised every week but not necessarily hard exercise and not every day. I went from never having an excuse to having a wide range of them.

     Two weeks ago, a great blessing occurred in my journey. Dwayne got his weight down to where he wants to work out with me! I have wanted this for a long time. I have nagged him for a long time. Yet, in his own timing, he was ready. Now when I would use my excuses, he gets me up going. When I am tired after work and driving from Tulsa and I want to veg out on the couch; he is waiting for me to exercise. After we are down, we get out showers and cook dinner and enjoy our evenings quilt free.
      Though I could walk my journey alone for a while, there came a point where I needed encouragement. I needed companionship. I needed a ‘we’ factor instead of an ‘I’ factor. This is the same for our spiritual journey. We can walk it alone for a while, but there comes a point where we need encouragement. We need companionship. We need others to care and feel a part of a family.
     Are you trying to walk through this life alone? Is everything private? Let yourself become connected to another Christian or to a body of believers. Share your struggles with a Christian friend. Pray together. Become a part of a home group or Sunday School Class. Don’t walk life’s journey alone?

Stoop down and reach up to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that you are badly deceived.

Galatians 6:2-3

Just Dance!!

     I have never read the book 'Two Steps Forward, One Step Back" but I have used the message in the title many times. So many times in life we get so discouraged when we have a step back with a particular goal or growth with the Lord. When we do, many times we want to just quit. We have to adopt the philosophy that whatever we are trying to accomplish, will be accomplished if we continue to try and we continue to improve. The only way we can fail is to quit! I have a great friend who walked across a parking lot with me, while we were taking two step forward, one step backward. The important thing is we made it to the finish line. It might have taken us a little longer, but we accomplished our goal. We often get frustrated when we 'make mistakes' or when we 'mess up' or we 'take a step backward'. Often when we do, we give ourselves permission to just quit! We say, "What is the use?" There is only one was to ensure failure and that is to quit. As long as we are doing something toward our goal, we will eventually succeed. What determines whether we succeed or fail, is what we do next after taking a step backward. If we sit down and stop stepping, if we just quit: we fail. If we take a step forward, we will stay at the place we began. However, if we take two steps forward, we will succeed. Once at a marriage retreat that Dwayne and I conducted, we had an activity to illustrate this. We went to the restaurant for lunch by taking two steps forward and one step backward all the way to lunch. I have used this activity before but only with individuals, this was the first time I used it with partners.  
     As I was watching all of my couples get to the restaurant, I noticed something quite amazing for me. They each were making it a dance! What a great picture. We could never dance without stepping backwards occasionally. Life is a dance! Dancing has steps forward and steps backward. Don't quit just because you step back, just make it into a dance. Every day we have an opportunity for a step forward. I don't know your specific goal, but whatever you are striving for can become a dance! If you took a step back today, start over tomorrow, just do not quit!! Every day gives you an opportunity for a new start, a step forward. God's mercy and manna are new everyday! How many days of new beginnings have you wasted by not even trying! Don't waste another one! Use every day as an opportunity to take a step toward God! And no matter what, just dance!!

One final word friends. We ask you--urge is more like it-- that you keep on doing what we told you to do to please god, not in a dogged religious plod, but in a living, spirited dance.

1 Thessalonians 4:1

The Secret Blessing

    We all have heard that it is better to give than to receive! I have been on both ends: I have received and I have given.  When a person gives a gift to me, it touches me. I experience the love in which it was given and it is truly a blessing. There have been a few times we have received a special gift from a nameless giver. I have to admit, I struggle with it. Who do I thank? Who can I attribute my gratitude and love too? Who loved me so much they saw and met a need?
     Also, I love meeting a person’s needs. I love seeing them happy and feeling blessed. I love it when they hug me and when they feel loved by me! Then I get love returned and we are all happy. There has been a few times I have forced myself to give anonymously.  I must say, it doesn’t feed my personal emotions quite the same. I don’t get any glory, I don’t get any feeling of pride, I don’t get any praise, and I don’t get any credit! It all goes to God!
     Isn’t that how it is suppose to be? When I give or when I receive anonymously, then the giver is taken out of the picture. The only thing you can say is God moved in someone's heart and He provided through that person. He gets the love, He gets the gratitude, and He gets the glory! Our life should be lived that way but our own need for emotional connection to others and the need to glorify ourselves get in the way.
     Every day we have to surrender self and stop fighting God for the glory which belongs only to Him. Today lets practice letting God get of all the glory by doing something for someone and doing it anonymously. Lets let God shine instead of us.

“When you do something for someone else, don’t call attention to yourself. You’ve seen them in action, I’m sure—‘playactors’ I call them—treating prayer meeting and street corner alike as a stage, acting compassionate as long as someone is watching, playing to the crowds. They get applause, true, but that’s all they get. When you help someone out, don’t think about how it looks. Just do it—quietly and unobtrusively. That is the way your God, who conceived you in love, working behind the scenes, helps you out."

Matthew 6:2-4  (The Message)

The Curse!

     Since I don’t think any men will be reading this devotion, let me tell you that I hate monthly periods. I am SICK, SICK, SICK of them!! I don't have a cute nickname for them because I don't think they deserve a cute name.  I think there should be a rule that states the younger you started the earlier you get to quit. I figure I have had periods for 40 years now; minus the three years I didn’t have them due to pregnancies and breast feeding. That means I have had them for 37 years. At an average of 5 days, I have had a period for 2200 days; or a little over six years worth of periods! Makes you sick to look at it like that doesn’t it! Some say it is because of the curse on Eve. I really only see scripture speak of ‘pain in childbirth’ as part of the curse. However, before sin there was paradise. I can’t imagine having the pain, the emotions, the swelling, and the headaches in paradise; so maybe it was.

     I have to admit that there is another part of the curse that I hate even more and I have lived with every single day for almost 30 years now. Scripture continues the ‘curse’ or discipline for the sin Eve let come into their lives by saying that a woman shall desire her husband but he will rule over her. Two point to clarify before we go on. One, it is not only Eve’s fault. We each allow sin in our lives on a daily basis. We are all in the same boat. Two, the word rule is for another day but don’t instantly build a defense about a word that our loving God uses and man has abused. Going on; we instantly think the word ‘desire’ has a sexual or passionate tone. It does not. The Hebrew meaning of the word means that we will want to walk over our husbands, or we will want to usurp their leadership. Due to sin, it is now in our nature. However, God comes back and says no matter how much you want to rule, lead, usurp; our husbands are to lead! God put in an order. Not a favor system! Dwayne and I believe that we are to work as hard as possible to come up with a solution that fits us both but when we can’t; it is his responsibility to make the decision and he will be accountable for that decision. Dwayne knows that it is important to listen to my thoughts and feelings and to weigh them with what he feels God is telling him. Even though we live this out in our marriage, even though I do not have a problem with God’s order and actually find security in it, and even though I want to respect Dwayne and his leadership; my sinful nature tries to usurp his leadership continuously. I use to say daily I fought it but with age and tiredness from the fight, I would say I still do it regularly.
     There was freedom for me to know that this internal fight to lead my husband is not something that I alone experience. It is what every wife experiences. No wife is immune. It is something we need to strive to control but it has become a part of our sinful nature. It is important for older women to teach the younger women how to fight this part of us. It is important for younger women to talk to older woman and learn. This is something we all have in common. How are you doing in your fight?

To the woman He said: “I will make you pains in childbirth very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to your children. Your desire will be for your husband, but he’ll rule over you.”

Genesis 3:16

Who do You Want to Applaud?

     I have been an achiever my complete life. Somewhere in my raising, I developed a belief that to be loved, I had to be good enough to deserve it; I had to do amazing things to make others proud of me; and I had to accomplish things to have security in my relationships. This has been a trap for me that have brought me many frustrations. The more 'to do' is made over my accomplishments the more love I feel. It is what drives me in the workplace to achieve and perform. However, even when I achieve things and I feel love in my life, I get insecure that my love is all based on my performance. This is why performance is never the answer to love. Love can only be based in God and what we do has to be for Him and nothing else and no one else. It is a lesson I have spent my life learning and as soon as I think I have conquered it; it shows it ugly face.
     I have been reading Mathew 6 and have been pondering it for weeks. The first verse speaks so loudly to me on this perpetual lesson of mine. I hope it speaks to you as it does me and that it causes you to reflect on its meaning.

Be especially careful when you are trying to be good so that you don’t make a performance out of it. It might be good theater, but the God who made you won’t be applauding.

Matthew 6:1